You join the throng of Freshman students filing into the arena and take an unoccupied seat. Looking around, the room is gradually filling up. Surprisingly most of the students seem quite presentable, but then you remember this is their first day, and some of them were probably dressed by their mothers to make a good impression.
At one end of the basketball court a small raised dais has been erected. With half a dozen chairs and a microphone stand on it. To either side of the dais stand the Raven's cheerleaders in their black red and white uniforms. Most are doing a good job of looking enthusiastic, but here and there you catch the bored expressions of those who could clearly thing of better ways to spend their Saturday evenings.
Once the hall is pretty much filled half a dozen faculty members, led by President Nelson mount the dais. He moves up to the microphone, whilst the others take seats. He cough's pointedly into the microphone causing whistling feedback, during which he signals frantically to someone up in the overhead score booth to turn it down.
"Good Evening. . ."
"Settle down now please"
"Good evening one and all, My name is James Nelson, President of East Texas University. May I take this opportunity to welcome you all to your Freshman year at ETU, and express what a pleasure it is to see so many of you joining us here tonight." The grandfatherly man at the microphone beams down at his audience as they quieten down before continuing.
"I remember what it was like to be a Freshman, oh so many years ago. More years ago than any of you have been alive, probably more years ago than you can even imagine. I do still remember the sense of excitement, of wonder, even the tiniest bit of anxiety as a arrived at college at the start of my studies. . ." He then continues in this vein for some time, interspersing his reminiscences, with useful information.
"Remember, if you bring a vehicle on campus you need to apply for a permit from the administration building. That permit will allow you to park in certain designated areas. Failure to park in those areas will result in. . ." Yeah, yeah, all this is in the orientation pack you were given.
". . . of course such incidents are rare. We place the utmost importance on the safety of our students. Should you have any concerns on that score then I urge you to contact the campus security team, based in the Linda Kirchman. . ."